Introductions - Please come here to introduce youself.

CDB45

I am caring for my 83 year old husband with dementia. He has had it since 2018 and is the 5th in his family to get it. The rest all died at 76 so we are actually doing quite well. Challenges are toileting and showering. I will be getting a raised toilet seat soon. We do get out to eat and baseball games and he is generally happy.

MoniqueFrahm

CDB45 Welcome to the chat room! I'm so glad you're here!

MoniqueFrahm

Evan-Mc Welcome, Evan!

kirk

Hello my name is Kirk. I have what is possibly a unique perspective on care giving. I was caring for my wife. She passed away from cancer 2 years ago. I am now helping my father and siblings care for our mother and she has dementia. Both of our parents are 81 and their health is declining.

dvellio

kirk
Welcome to our little group.

MoniqueFrahm

kirk I'm so sorry for your loss, Kirk.

Welcome to our group, we're happy to have you!

birchcraft

I am caring for my 99 year old Mother who has dementia, 2 heart stints, urine tract infections, a history of C.Diff, high blood pressure, depression and 48 falls at home.

dvellio

birchcraft
Sounds like you have your hands full. Welcome, hope we can help in some way.

SharingIsCaring

I just attended my first doctor appointment with my mom (83) & her doctor. She is struggling with executive function and our family was concerned she shouldn't be driving. My sister wrote a letter to the DMV. After reading an account of my observations, talking to her about her last accident a year ago, and administering a cognitive test, her doctor agreed and told her she should not drive. She also ordered a brain MRI. My mom didn't seem to process the doctor's statement. She keeps talking about reading the driver's handbook, and told me that it's so complicated because the state is trying to remove drivers to reduce traffic! She hasn't driven in 10 months & my son has been putting her off on the used car he was repairing for her. I'm worried she's declining because she has little social interaction. I'm hoping to get her to use her new Uber skills to visit the senior center.

KEB

Hello, I'm KE, the only child and care manager of my widowed 80 yo Mother who's missing half her brain from a traumatic injury (TBI) 13 years ago -- the effect is very much like dementia and her actual dementia, more recently diagnosed, is developing rapidly -- though hard to track in the constant juggle with urinary tract infections, C Diff, and severely impaired walking (with a walker and ankle brace). We're newly returning to Atlanta, where she'll have a condo next to mine. Especially I'm looking for recommendations on finding good in-home personal care assistants to help with "activities of daily life" (e.g. cleaning, dressing), meal prep and serving, and errands. Has anyone found good local agencies, forums, or registry/posting sites (e.g. care.com)? I'm up for working with a commercial agency or hiring independently, have done both with varying success. Thank you! It's wonderful to read about different experiences and relate with many others on this site.

Cristen

I am 59, early retired elementary music teacher, full time caregiver for 83 year old mother. I had been living with parents a few years prior to my father’s death almost 3 years ago. Mom had been showing signs of dementia and was diagnosed with vascular dementia. Mom had been healthy and physically active but has quickly declined. I have good family and church support. My sisters and I tried hiring in help after dad died, while I continued to work but mom is not receptive to help. Year and half ago she fell in yard and broke hip. Although she recovered physically, she declined a great deal mentally. The fall was a blessing in that it allowed my sisters and I to get her to accept help from us and we all began educating ourselves on her condition. Since her fall, I retired from teaching to be full time caregiver. I am fortunate to be able to provide home preschool for my twin grandchildren. We also have an active senior center nearby. I am striving to continue educating myself about mom’s care as I am trying to give her a good quality of life as she comes to the end of her time here.

dvellio

Cristen
Welcome to out little group.

Careformom

Hello everyone, I’m Heidi, I’m 35, and I have been a caregiver to my mother for the past four years now. She is currently 70. It began with just helping around the house because she was in too much pain and too depressed to do it herself. Four months ago I brought her to the hospital because she was bright yellow and she’s been declining rapidly ever since. She has end stage liver failure and is not diagnosed with dementia but due to her ammonia levels she is extremely confused all the time and can’t hold a conversation. Her edema is also so bad that she is no longer mobile. So before a couple months ago I was able to work and pay bills, but now I care for her full time and cannot work or pay the bills. That’s about all of it, thanks for listening.
Heidi

Philodot

I am Dwight, 78 yo, good health, wife of 38 yrs, Alzheimer’s diagnosis three yrs ago, she doesn’t think I am her husband, hates me, starting to wander a little, losing appetite,except PBJ, klepto, family cannot help much. Suggestions for in home respite care search methods other than care.com, place for mom and other entities who want your money, personal info, email , etc. to flood you with ads?

Mare

I'm an 83 year old caregiver to an 81 year old husband. I think this has been going on for several years as his friends noticed his decline when he went to camp with them. I did too but they confirmed my thoughts. At one point the doctor said he he was in the early stages of Alzheimers. I know he has Dementia. Now he must be further advanced. He can't remember where the bathroom is. I have to show him. Has peed on the floor quite a few times. Have to give him a bath. Have to dress him. He wears depends all the time now. They are soaked when I take them off. Have a hard time getting him to change them for the night. Put a pad under the sheet. Have put a pad on the couch but he removes it if he sees it. He is unable to do any tasks. Takes the mail if he sees it. I might find it in his dresser drawer. Hopefully they're not bills or anything important. No longer clothes there. Maybe a bunch of wrenches. He'll go from room to room getting into drawers, desks, bookshelves, and has even knocked the computer screen over. Removed wires from the cable box. Has swollen feet but won't sit for long. Won't keep the feet raised. Have to get him compression stockings. Couldn't get a pee sample at the doctors. They sent the container home. But don't think I'll have any luck with that either. I could go on and on. The point is I can work doing any number of tasks but I'm not up to being a caregiver.

Mare

[deleted]

Hi, I'm Mariana!

Janetboozell

I am Janet caring for an 89-year-old mother with unbelievably severed arthritis and also stage six dementia. The biggest challenge is for me are moving her without hurting myself having read the previous guys post the 84 year old taking care of an 86 year old I feel I should be counting my blessings

Philodot

Caring for my Alzheimer's wife of almost 4 decades, diagnosed 4-5 yrs. ago. To all of you caregivers, peace to you and to all of those you care about.

TomMinn

Hello
I’m Tom, Caregiver to my wife of 47 years who is currently suffering with Alzheimer’s.

Philodot

When I did introductory reply there was an error response several times, that is likely why there are duplicate messages, I apologize - following instructions from computer.

Madison

Philodot No problem! I apologize, the error was on our end. I removed the duplicates. Welcome to the Trualta Community Chat!

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