This is the flip-side of WHO AM I?, giving myself, as caregiver, a voice:
WHO AM I? (flip side)
(The original version of this was written by Sr. Mary Lea Glaser, CPPS.
I have modified it to have my own voice.)
I have been a son, a brother, an uncle,
a cousin, a husband, a godfather, a sponsor,
a teacher, a research scientist, a technical writer,
a volunteer, a neighbor, a friend.
Now I am also a cook, a dishwasher, a housekeeper, a chauffeur,
a personal shopper, a nurse, an activity director,
a hair stylist, a manicurist, a laundress, an interpreter (‘aphasia speak’ to English),
a mind reader, an advocate, a multi-tasker, and so much more.
You see, I am a living, breathing, exhausted person
who happens to be a caregiver for someone (my wife)
who has Alzheimer’s Disease.
I’ve been important in others’ lives.
I’ve been there for many to count on.
And now the most important person in my life is at the top of the list.
But the sad part is that, at times,
she is unaware of who I am.
Things that she used to do to help others, and herself,
I am doing for her.
Do you wonder why some days I am angry and frustrated?
I am at home but it is not the same.
Pictures of people and places hang on the wall.
But mostly we don’t often see them.
Even though she doesn’t always recognize me,
I hold on to the love I’ve always had for her.
Love endures all!
In some ways we have switched roles,
so I care for her as she cared for me, for others.
So, love me, care about me, give me hugs,
bolster my self-esteem, be there for me, if you can.
And, pray for me.
It may be sad, or rather hard, for you
to come and see her as she is,
and remember her as she was.
But please do visit, we BOTH need you in our lives.
Hold on to the things you can remember about us.
Find out about this insidious disease yourself.
Do what you can to educate others.
Thanks for supporting those who are working
to understand and combat Alzheimer’s Disease.
And always remember – I LOVE YOU and so does she!
