Husband confused about having to use the bathroom

Twyla

My husband is confused about having to use the bathroom and where to use it. I constantly throughout the day ask him do you have to go to the bathroom he might say yes and sometimes no. If yes he will get up and start walking to the dining room and not the bathroom. I have to show him where the bathroom is. Is there anyone else having this problem or can give some advice. Thank you

dvellio

This was a serious problem with my wife while she could still get up and walk on her own. I finally put a bedside commode in the computer room where she spends most of her waking hours. Even then she would forget and try to go across the hallway to use the bathroom. Four of the eight times she fill in a two year period were trying to get back to the computer room from the bathroom. It was her most dangerous trip. She just couldn't remember that there was a commode in the room she was already in.
I believe one of the biggest challenges in taking care of a dementia patient is the fact that they can’t remember what they can’t do. She hasn’t even been able to stand up since the middle of June but she still thinks she could get up and go climb into bed. Luckily for me she can’t even get out of her wheelchair or bed anymore without help.

I just have to remember that it isn’t her fault, her disease took away that ability and getting upset or angry with her won’t help either of us. She is doing the best she can.

Twyla

I was talking to someone today about my husband’s issue and she told me instead of asking him do he have to use the bathroom just take him like you are potty training your child. I picked him up today from the Senior Center and I said let’s go to the bathroom. He said ok. I help him sit on the toilet. He ended up doing his #2.(sorry) So I will start just taking him to the toilet especially when I know he’s been drinking and haven’t used the bathroom.

Bob

I typically ask my wife if she has to go to the bathroom. Even if she says 'No', but I realize that it has been awhile since the last time she went I still still do what I can to gently persuade her to go to the bathroom. Most of the time she will say 'Yes', and I take her, help her with her clothing, help her onto the toilet, wipe her, help her off the toilet, and help her with her clothing. A year ago I was tired of washing her underwear daily so I started putting Depends underwear on her, which she accepted with no problem. this has helped because she has had some episodes of incontinence, though not all the time. At night, which has been more problematic, I have started using a Tena product which is more absorbent. This saves me from have to change her nightgown, and the bed pad, if she has an accident overnight.