I'm struggling with a similar situation. My wife has mid to late stage Alzheimer's and I have been caring for her at home for over four years now, first by myself, and now with the help of home care workers each weekday afternoon. She walks well, but wanders all day. She is incontinent. My biggest challenge now is hygiene. For me, I think that when it gets to the point where either she has to be in a wheelchair (our house is too small to accommodate a wheelchair), or her health is at risk because I, nor my helpers, can properly attend to her hygiene needs, then I will have to move her to a memory care facility. I have already toured several in our area, and, when I go, I take a four-page questionnaire that I have developed to make sure I get all my questions answered before I leave. This has helped me to better decide where to place her once it is necessary, and prevent me from going into a panic when the time comes, or if placement is needed due a crisis situation development.
